Hey there Pop,

Should I tell you what I got you for Christmas? Or do you already know?

I had a whole list of stuff to get you, this year I really had a bunch of great stuff. I guess the good news is that I only bought the one thing - so it's not like I have to return a bunch of stuff or figure out the correct new recipient.

I did get you that one thing - the Indians baseball cap, right from the ballpark. It has great stitching on it, it's not one of the fitted ones, but it's a nice one. I would give it to Jerry, but I bought one for him while I was there. And I just can't give it to anyone. Somehow, even though I never gave it to you, it's yours and I'm not ready to just give it away.

I was going to finally get you a Michigan flag, I've been meaning to do it since we moved, but I just never got around to it.

Of course I found a book that you would have loved, it's called Traffic. It's about why we all do the dumb things we do in cars. I heard about it on the radio one day and thought that you'd really get a kick out of it. I'd get it for Uncle Jim, but I'm never really sure of his reading level since the stroke and I hate to make it hard on him.

Mostly I just wish that Christmas would be over already. The only one who even wants to celebrate is Mer and I think it's just because of the girls - none of us have our hearts in it. I didn't even decorate our house this year. Mom's not faring much better, she's behind and feels overwhelmed with all the day to day stuff that throwing Christmas in on top of it is too much.

Scott and I took the girls down to Prime Smoked Meats to get the ham - that was an adventure. I thought it was by the old Swan's market, but it wasn't. And when we got there they were out of just about all the different types of ham. We got a giant bone in ham, I hope it's right! But it's not like we had a ton of choice - I guess I should just be happy that they had some hams left.

We all went Union Square to see the menorah lighting, tonight was the first night of Hanukkah. The girls had a great time, there was a band and a craft booth. Did I mention that it was raining the whole time? It was, but everyone had a pretty good sense of humor about it.

I really wanted to go - somehow it seems really important to me that I get to celebrate Hanukkah this year, usually it's just something that Scott and I do. Maybe it's just that I really don't want to celebrate Christmas at all this year. I wouldn't even have flown home if I thought I could have gotten away with it (not like Mom would have let me, but...).

We're changing the whole time table of Christmas too. We're going to have everyone over around 1pm. No more Christmas morning. It had to happen some time, but now seems to be the best time for it. No one can bear the thought of you not being here to cook breakfast. And I can't stand the thought of you not sitting in the big chair falling asleep while we all open presents. So this way Uncle Jim and Aunt Cindy and Greg will arrive at the same time as Mer and Jerry and the girls - and we'll have more of an afternoon of it. Hopefully we'll have time to play games and other things without everything being too rushed. I think it will be good.

I'm really missing you a lot Pop, I'm just not sure how I'm going to make it through the next couple of days. I'm sure that I'll just keep at it the way I've been, but it's hard to be here without you.

Talk to you later Pop, I love you.

Hey there Pop,

I can't believe all the TV you're missing!

So now on CSI New York the girl who plays Montana (I'm sure you would remember her name, but I never can) is pretending to be pregnant. Was it last season that she really was pregnant and kept hiding it behind files and everything? So now they're writing it into the story line that she and Danny are dating again and now accidentally pregnant.

Then on Brothers and Sisters, most of the story line is ok - nothing earth shattering - but this last episode had a Keb' Mo' song. I don't know if he's gaining in popularity or if I'm just hearing him more. I have your CD, but it took me a bit to figure which song it was and it is one of the ones on the CD (even though I can't remember the name of it right now).

Grey's Anatomy isn't breaking any new ground. Though Denny is back, sort of, and they've been focusing a bit too much on the whole heart thing (which for obvious reasons I'm not a huge fan of). Hahn left, which is ok with me, since I never really liked her much. Anyway, I'm not so sure that I'm going to be asking for the DVD for Christmas (but then what else would she get me?). Sadly, Private Practice isn't that much better. They've started making Addison a better character again, but it's still not rocking my world. She was so great in Grey's, I just wish she was that good in Private Practice.

Oh yeah, and Grisom is about to leave CSI! Well, you know how Sara left (which was just fine by me) and now he's going too - thought I don't know if the two are going to be connected. They're bringing in Lawrence Fishburn, so that should be good. Though I did like that guy that they brought in for him last time, but since they killed off the character I suppose that he won't be coming back (then again I probably would have said that about Denny too).

I know that I told you I'm re-watching the West Wing. It really was such a great show, all the writing and the lighting - plus I love the walk and talk scenes, is there any other show that does that? We're up to the part where Ainsley Hayes has joined - and they had the Gilbert and Sullivan songs. Even Scott watches them every once and a while. Though last week was the episode where Josh got shot. I remembered the episode and the flash backs, but I didn't remember the part where his dad died of a Pulmonary Embolism. That I could have done without!

Alright, I've rambled on long enough.

Talk to you later Pop, I love you.